Jan 11, 2023
Questioning a lot? Should I say this, should I not? Am I nagging? Let’s have a dive into what to do!
The best answer is yes! Talk it out. Whenever you have an issue the best possible thing to do is not keep it in. Bottling your feelings will either end up exploding out randomly from the slightest trigger or be reflected on how you react to others or your partner themselves.
For example, the more you bottle your feelings the more aggression or upset could contribute to the things you do. This takes a toll on your mental health and impacts communication in general.
Short answer…it will come out one way or another, but bottling your thoughts will never resolve the issue.
Communication is one of the key foundations of any relationship. It allows for the building blocks of honesty allowing for trust to be build. So here are some top tips to being open and honest in a relationship.
If you are a hot-headed person, impulsively shouting your emotions may not be the best way either, so taking a moment beforehand to figure out your actual emotions and calmly saying it in a way your partner will understand.
Pick a time when you and your partner are calm.
If your partner is shouting, in a mood or stressed, talking about another issue may do more damage and create more distance than do good.
Use your intuition to see whether it is a good time to bring it up.
Try and speak softly and calm and explain how you feel in a way your partner understands. Communication is about mutual understanding of one another, and not about one complaining to the other.
Speaking bluntly may also be a shock to your partner and they may not take it how you mean. So, take your time to figure out how you actually feel!
It can be easy to feel pressured to answer questions so take your time. Allow yourself time to think about what you want to say. Impulsive answers may not come out the right way.
Even if you may disagree it is important to listen to them and make them feel like they are being heard. It is okay to have some disagreements.
Compromise is key! Sometimes things can be left disagreed upon, but with some things, both partners must meet in the middle to move forwards, so be open to compromising.
Just as you may find it hard to express how you feel when bringing the subject to your partner, put yourself in their shoes… their first response may not be how they feel. You will have time to think about what you wanted to say, so allow them the time to process what you have said to them, to allow them to reflect their true emotions – be patient with their responses.
Remember do not ever invalidate your own feelings – they are yours and you cannot help them, but communication can. Speak to one of our relationship therapists about couples therapy to figure out the best way to help your situation. Head Agenda are here to help every step of the way.
Disclaimer: This article has been designed for entertainment and informational purposes; it is not personalised medical advice. This guide may be a useful read to generate some ideas, however, please take advice from a medical professional.